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bees2001
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Name: Justin
Country: United States
State: Virginia
Metro: Lynchburg
Birthday: 8/16/1983
Gender: Male
Interests: I'm really big into music, and unlike half of lynchburg, i'm not scene or hXc or straightedge or whatever the gay grouping junk that people are a part of, I'm me and that about sums it up. I love Halo even though I'm not really good, I like to just hang out and watch football and stuff.
Expertise: I'm good with computers, well mainly I just try doing stuff until it works, even if that means I screw something up, which I usually do. I do web design and that junk too.
Occupation: Student
Message: message meEmail: email me
Website: visit my website
AIM:  bees2001
MSN: bees2001@hotmail.com
Member Since:
10/3/2005
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| So with my job, I drive alot. And it gets boring after a while, so that's why I have my ipod. Alot of times i'm just listening to music, but I also download teachings from several pastors, mainly Rob Bell, Jeff Manion, and Erwin McManus. These guys are brilliant. This though stems off a message by Jeff Manion from Ada Bible Church in Grand Rapids, Mi. He just recently finished up a series called the land between. He took different stories from the time israel was between the promise land and egypt. His first message was basically summed up in this, "the land between is fertile ground for several things; complaning, struggles, and faith." I've noticed this in my life.... I'm in this "land between" right now. I just graduated from LU this past May, and I haven't (if i decide to at all) started Grad School yet. I'm between a lot of things in my life right now, and it's tough. This is me being real, I'm struggling with trusting God fully, it's hard for me to give up control and be completely helpless, and i'm learning, but everytime i think i have a grasp on things and have given up control, a circumstance, person, or memory comes back and i feel the need to take it back. It's quite nerveracking, and i dont know how to fix that. I guess the first step is I have realized I'm in this land between stage, I know that God is going to take care of me, and I guess i'm just an impatient person. There's a whole lot of things i've learned too, like i dont need a girlfriend, even though I would like one. I don't need to know what's gonna happen in the next month, even though I would like to. I dont need to be everything to all people, even though I would like to. I dont know where this is really going, I guess it's just my stream of thought. I've been bottling things up for the longest time, and i guess they are just coming out, so if you're still reading, thanks, and i hope you will leave thoughts, or encouragement cuz i can use it. I guess mainly my problem stems from feeling inadequet. I'm doing this media thing for one community and it's scaring me because i have no idea what i'm doing. I mean i know how to run sound and i know some other things, but i dont know how to do other things that are expected of me and i guess that scares me. I dont know whatelse i need to say, i guess that take this for what it's worth. If you're in this "land between" stage, take heart because you're not alone. I'm a firm believer that no one should have to go through life alone, and it's easy to feel alone in this stage, trust me because i feel that way all the time. So if any of you ever need to talk, let me know because i know how it feels. Thanks for reading :)
on this journey with you,
-justin
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| so i'm sittin here thinking about the last year.... my birthday is in a few weeks and i'll be 23.... makes me think of the Jimmy Eat World song "23" .... good song by the way..... so yea i've been thinking about my journey the last year. the good times, bad times, confussing times, and learning times..... i've definately learned a lot..... i've learned a lot about myself and other people..... i've made friendships and lost friendships... i've learned that I dont have to put up a front (even though sometimes i still do). I've learned that "love wins". I've learned that I'm in a good place. I've learned that I have passions for things I didnt have before, and passions I had about things before I no longer have. I've learned how to develop my gifts. I've learned what I don't want in a relationship.... I've learned about maturity. I've learned about being independant. I've learned that seminary doesn't seem the road for me. I've learned that I want to help people through counseling. Most of all.... I'm still learning who I am... Do I wish I could change things in the last year.... most certainly.... would I change them? probably not.... Do I wish I could make memories go away? sure..... would I if I could? probably not..... Do I wish the ones could feel the pain they have caused me? oh yea.... would i put them through that if I could? i doubt it..... is that a sign of maturity? ya know... .when you can say that you wish someone the best....and really mean it.... even though they caused you to hurt? I'm sure some of you know the instance I'm talking about.... yea it was a year ago this well that process started..... if you dont know... ask me.... so i guess to sum all this up.... live in the moment you are given.... because at that point in time, that is where you are supposed to be.... hopefully next year I will develop more new friendships and make the ones i have now even better.... | | |
| so today i've had some thoughts on life in general. There is always someone or something that influences your life. Erwin McManus said in one of his recent talks, "What you practice is who you will become" I think you can take it a step further, who or what you let influence your life is who you become. I'm blessed to be influenced by my dad. I couldn't ask for a better father, I would be happy to be half the father he is when I have my own kids. With that being said, I know he makes mistakes. This all takes me back to when I was a lil kid. Superheros are huge when you're young, you always have someone to idolize. I always kinda thought of my dad as this superhero. No matter what, I never thought he could mess up. Now, I know he does, but that makes me respect him more. Let's go from there.... I have a heavenly father. I know that no matter what, he cannot mess up. It violates his character. It seems almost too simple and a cliche to say he's my idol, because i know there is no way possible for me to be like him. I'm not perfect and I realize that, but the difference is that I realize that I can strive to be, knowing that along the way I will fail at achieving the goal of perfection. Could it be possible that perfection is a process? Maybe to achieve perfection, you have to understand that you can't be..... it seems contradictory, but it's not... perfection is only achieved upon death, if you are a Christ follower, and the process to perfection is this life at hand. ... after all that being said, let's jump back to influence. If you let positive things influence you, chances are you'll turn to being a positive person. If you let God influence your life, you'll be heading on the right way to perfection.... make sense? So there are my thoughts on influence..... "What you practice is who you will be come" think about it.... | | |
| so I was told by Shauna that I needed to write a new blog.... so here it is.... this is a spin off one of my chapters in my book... i think that sometimes in life we miss out on so many opportunities because we are scared to take the risk. So here's the question, are you living to die or dying to live? Let me explaing...... are you just trying to make it through life to die, or are you really dying to take those chances and live life for what it's worth... There are moments in life that are defining moments. These are key, because the decision you make in these moments will determine the course your life will take. For instance, a job opportunity that you could take. The decision you make in this instance will determine the course your life takes at that moment in time. I dont know if i'm making sense, but the point i'm trying to get across is make sure you dont pass up these defining moments, make sure you are sensitive to the decision you are to make, and take risks. Live in the realm of challenges, it will give you the chance to use your untapped potential.
on this journey with you,
Justin | | |
| so i'm sittin here just before 11:30pm.... God seems to always speak at late times..... and right now i'm listening to Relient K. "Getting into you" hence the title of this blog. here are the lyrics and i'll elaborate after you read through them...
when i made up my mind
and my heart along with that
to live not for myself
but yet for God
somebody said
"do you know what you are getting yourself into?"
when i finally ironed out
all of my priorities
and asked God to remove the doubt
that makes me unsure of these
things i ask myself
i ask myself
"do you know what you are getting yourself into?"
i'm getting into you
because you got to me
in a way words can't describe
i'm getting into you
because i've got to be
you're essential to survive
i'm going to love you with my life
when he looked at me and said
"i kind of view you as a son"
and for a second our eyes met
and i met that with a question
"do you know what you are getting yourself into?"
i'm getting into you
because you got to me
in a way words can't describe
i'm getting into you
because i've got to be
you're essential to survive
i'm going to love you with my life
i've been a liar and i'll never amount to
the kind of person you deserve to worship you
you say you will not dwell on what i did but rather what i do you say
"i love you and that's what you are getting yourself into"
i'm getting into you (getting into you)
because you got to me (because you got to me)
in a way words can't describe
i'm getting into you (getting into you)
because i've got to be (because i've got to be)
you're essential to survive
i'm going to love you with my life
i'm getting into you (getting into you)
because you got to me (because you got to me)
in a way words can't describe
i'm getting into you (getting into you)
because i've got to be (because i've got to be)
you're essential to survive
i'm going to love you with my life
you said "i love you and that's what you're getting into"
so yea these words move me.... in some spiritual way... it's hard to explain, but reading through this, i'm comforted, because to tell you the truth, the last line of the song says everything about the Christian life.... "you said 'I love you and that's what you're getting into" We have no idea what to really expect in the Christan life. God just asks us to follow him. Atleast that's the case for me... I'm at the point in my life where I have to live each day by faith... each day is a step out trusting that God will watch over me.... and it's actually kinda cool... the Christian life shouldn't be based on rules and stuff we have to follow, that's getting into legalism..... that's how the world used to work. When Jesus died on the cross, religion died, the way things used to work died.... not saying that we are free to do whatever we want, but salvation is no longer based on the law, it's based on grace.... Grace... wow... God loves us.... and he let his son come to earth, and die a horrible death. I don't know if you understand what crucifixion is, and i'm really not getting into the details, but the Romans were artists at cruel and unusual punishment.... they literally sat around and thought of the worst way to punish someone (put them to death) and at this point in time crucifixion was it.... it was horrible, and Jesus endured that for us because of love.... he knew we would screw up and he knew we would deny him and he knew all of this and he still took it.... because of love..... the universe started working in a different way then, because before then, it was all about what you had to do.... and when Jesus did that, it became what you didn't have to do or the lack of what you had to do.... because that's just it, you dont have to do anything.... you just have to realize that he died for you so you could be free from the hold that sin has on our life. I don't get how we can make something so simple, so freakin complicated..... why can't we just accept that this (salvation) is all based on love and grace.... is it maybe because we don't understand the perfect love that did this (died on the cross) ? I really don't have the answers, I'm just throwing it out there.... and I don't really have a huge point to make, all I'm trying to get across is that you should know what you're getting into.....and that's God's love.... his perfect, sincere, NEVER FAILING love.....
//do you know what youre getting into? | | |
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